Remodeling my bathroom has led me to learn about and purchase several new items. I finally broke down and bought a caulk gun (see my previous Caulking on Sunshine post), I learned what aisle of Home Depot wood putty is in, and bought my very own power sander. My most fascinating purchase, however, was the new toilet.
I had no idea there are so many commode options are out there. It felt like buying a car, only without the guidance of a Kelley Blue Book. Do I want my toilet to be tricked out with a dual flushing system (one button for #1s and another button for #2s)? What about color? White? Ivory? Beige? Not to mention the age-old elongated versus round debate! If you are environmentally sensitive (like me), then you obviously will want a high-efficiency toilet to save water. If you are handicapable, you might want to say "I do" to the taller model.
And, oh, the names! Here are just a few of my favorites:
|The Cadet 3 Bone. |
|The Stinson Biscuit. |
I thought this name sounded lame, but then it reminded me of
the small yet talented Seabiscuit. He was a badass.
This one just sounds pretentious. Get off your, high horse,
Prelude. You are a dirty coprophile, just like your comrades.
|Champion 4 MAX .|
This toilet is only for real men, sort of like
Dr. Pepper 10. I blushed just looking at it.
They saved money by not coming up with a clever name,
and passed the savings on to us, the consumers.
|Don't let us down, Cadet 3. We're relying on you, soldier.|