7 Quick Takes Friday (9)

Check out Jen's quick takes!

After much deliberation, I recently made my first big purchase using my law office credit card.

What is this high-tech piece of gadgetry, you ask?  Why, a paper shredder of course!  My favorite thing about this paper shredder is not its ability to shred even cds and credit cards, nor is it the ease with which the paper shreddings can be emptied.  No.  It is the warning symbols on the front.

I'm not one for reading instruction manuals, unless I have to put the product together myself.  I have made certain assumptions about what these warning symbols mean.  Are they correct?  Who knows.  Who cares?  Not I.

(1)

Check tire pressure.  I am definitely familiar with the exclamation
symbol, as it has been lit up in my car for months now.

(2)

No clapping! No matter how much this product delights you.

(3)

No shredding of tools.  This product is strong,
but not screwdriver strong.

(4)

Don't feel the need to dress up when using this product.
A button-up shirt and khakis will work just fine. 

(5)

Do not spray paint this product.
It looks good just the way God made it.

(6)

Do not use this product to trim your hair, even though you feel as
though you can trust this magnificant machine with your very life.

(7)

Finally, for the love of all things sacred, never, EVER, let children 
use this machine while they are holding hands with teddy bears.